Monday 31 May 2010

2010/11 Mismanagement

With all the pomp and ceremony accorded such a momentous occasion, the outgoing JMs announced the all NEW Burnie H3 mismanagement committee (see if you can spot the difference):

Grand Master - BoomBoom
Joint Masters - Giggles and Urang
On Sec - Bint
Hash Cash - Chunder
Hash Hops - Ringo
Hash Lips - Speed Hump and Knickers
Trailmaster - Dyke
Hash Flash - Ringo
Hash Horn - Chunder
Hash Monk - GonZo
Hash LegEnd - Trakka
Web Wanker - A Bit of This

Friday 28 May 2010

Hash Trash 28 May 2010

And so (starting the sentence off with a invariable grammatical particle) the end is here, and so I face the final curtain.

Why staring at household furnishings is important is unclear, however the sentiment is not. For the final time, those nominally in charge of Burnie Hash will mix their last brew, type their last trash, spruik their last skol and, most importantly, hit 'send' on their final e-mail, as Burnie Hash moves into another hashing year with a new breed of mismanagers.

The final fling for the class of oh-nine-ten will be held this Saturday at the Gawler Entertainment Centre (1054 Isandula Rd, Gawler). This magical event will start at 5:00pm with a moon-lit ramble set by Grand Wizened Ratchet, followed by eye of newt and toe of frog, or if you're really lucky some of Knickers' fizzing pasta.

The sorting hat will then be used to anoint those wot dun good during the year (Bolt Error Award, GM's Traditional Award for Excellence in Hashing) from those wot dun craptacular (Cocque Cup, Richard Cranium Award), plus other awards for which the recipients will collect all manner of Urang's cast offs held together with hot glue.

JMs Phay Ray and DT*cough* will then declare all positions vacant (which is more easily done for some than it is for others) before announcing the next batch of bitches in control... I mean witches in control of Burnie Hash.

Bring hat (black and pointy), mug, joke, friend and $10 for bucket and nibbles - bring a plate of something to share and grog for the long haul.

That's it folks. With a tear in my eye and a heavy heart I sign off FOR THE FINAL TIME and wish the NEW WEB WANKER all the best for the coming year. I did it...
-------------------------------
UP AND CUMMING. († updated)
Friday May 28 — LoonRhasH @ Ulverstone
Saturday May 29 – Burnie H3 AGPU
June 12-13 – Chardonnay Highland Fling (SOLD OUT)
Saturday June 26 - LoonRhasH @ Shearwater
July 2-4 – 2010 Rainforest Interhash www.borneointerhash2010.com
August 7 - Hash Ball
August 14 - Wild West Weekend VIII @ Waratah
September 4 - DH3 Tour de Pisse
October 10 - Global Harriettes Day (10/10/10)
October 16-17 - Burnie Ten weekend
-------------------------------
RECEDING HARELINE († updated)
R*n 1054 - 29/05/2010 - AGPU - Ratchet @ 1054 Isandula Rd, Gawler
R*n 1055 - 06/06/2010 - HOFT - Dyke - HOFT to Little Fishers River
R*n 1056 - 13/06/2010 - Highland Fling (SOLD OUT - no room at the Inn)

On! On!
Grizzly

...my way!

Friday 21 May 2010

Hash Trash 21 May 2010

Dear reader

I hope that this humble communication finds you well. You certainly didn't allude to any ailments when you e-mailed me two minutes ago to complain about the lack of 'trash', so I'll assume that you have little else to worry about at this time.

I understand that this week's trail is being set by Chunder. I do hope that the boy has found some visible flour this time; I must say that I have kept an eye out for his special invisible flour at my local inconvenience store, but have found it as elusive as fresh non-bendy/wilted vegetables. Fresh Food People, my sphincter (sorry Dins).

His choice of trail start is also somewhat beguiling; again with the effing boat ramps. I swear that he's doing this on purpose. Apparently it starts from the second boat ramp, but from which end do you count? I know that GonZo says that there are three, so second from either end is still the same, but I swear that those things pop in and out from alternate dimensions - there were never three boat ramps when I was terrorising the neighbourhood.

Trail, of course, starts at 3:00pm, which allows enough time to run, walk or stroll the trail, have a circle, meal and still be home in time for whichever excuse for entertainment starts at 7:30pm (I'm sorry, but unless there's a three metre scarf involved, he's not MY Doctor). Slight fly in the ointment this week, however, as the meal will be at a local hotel, but I'm sure that Speed Hump will arrange for the meals to be pre-ordered and on the table at 6:00pm!

Bring hat, blah, blah, blah.

One week until the AGPU. Just one more of these things to complete and just one more week to be harangued by the Pommie harridan (20/20 is NOT real cricket).

Lovingly yours
Web Wanker
-------------------------------
UP AND CUMMING. († updated)
Friday May 28 — LoonRhasH @ Ulverstone
Saturday May 29 – Burnie H3 AGPU
June 12-13 – Chardonnay Highland Fling
Saturday June 26 - LoonRhasH @ Shearwater
July 2-4 – 2010 Rainforest Interhash www.borneointerhash2010.com
August 7 - Hash Ball
August 14 - Wild West Weekend VIII @ Waratah
September 4 - DH3 Tour de Pisse
October 10 - Global Harriettes Day (10/10/10)
October 16-17 - Burnie Ten weekend
-------------------------------
RECEDING HARELINE († updated)
† R*n 1053 - 23/05/2010 - Chunder @ 2nd Wynyard boat ramp
R*n 1054 - 29/05/2010 - AGPU - Ratchet @ 1054 Isandula Rd, Gawler
R*n 1055 - 06/06/2010 - HOFT - Dyke @ TBA
R*n 1056 - 13/06/2010 - Highland Fling

On! On!
Grizzly

Friday 14 May 2010

Hash Trash 14 May 2010

It's hash party central* this weekend, with birthday celebrations, house warmings and hen/stag parties abounding. If you don't end up inebriated this weekend, then you're not really trying (or you've not been invited; sucks to be you).

The molten lava core of this party planet will be at the House of Hump II, with Speed Hump kicking her fully sick house warming off on Saturday night with perhaps scones with jam and cream, followed by charades and maybe a late night cream sherry.

With all this excitement, the Trailmaster has opted for a hangover-friendly jaunt from HoHII on Ridgley Road, starting at 3:00pm. Bring party hat, mug, joke, friend and $10 for Berocca and cold sausage rolls.

* it's not really all that central if it's 350km apart, but the rich vein of alcohol runs deep through the state, linking us all together in Saturday night stupor
-------------------------------
UP AND CUMMING. († updated)
Friday May 28 — LoonRhasH @ Ulverstone
Saturday May 29 – Burnie H3 AGPU
June 12-13 – Chardonnay Highland Fling
Saturday June 26 - LoonRhasH @ Shearwater
July 2-4 – 2010 Rainforest Interhash www.borneointerhash2010.com
August 7 - Hash Ball
August 14 - Wild West Weekend VIII @ Waratah
September 4 - DH3 Tour de Pisse
October 10 - Global Harriettes Day (10/10/10)
October 16-17 - Burnie Ten weekend
-------------------------------
RECEDING HARELINE († updated)
† R*n 1052 - 16/05/2010 - A Bit of This @ Ridgley
R*n 1053 - 23/05/2010 - Chunder @ TBA
R*n 1054 - 29/05/2010 - AGPU - Ratchet @ 1054 Isandula Rd, Gawler
R*n 1055 - 06/06/2010 - HOFT - Dyke @ TBA
R*n 1056 - 13/06/2010 - Highland Fling

On! On!
Grizzly

Friday 7 May 2010

Hash Trash 7 May 2010

Mothers Day. Can there be any more stressful day of the year? A day where the dreams and expectations of mothers remain unreconciled against the reality of unthinking and uncaring fathers and children. You really thought that she wanted those new car mats? Can't understand why tickets to Top Gear Live is met with a shoulder so cold that it's positively glacial?

Live in fear no more, for what more could any mother want on her special day than to head off to a Burnie hash trail?

This year's MD trail is being set by that sensitive, new-age gent BoomBoom and will start from 15 Loongana Place Somerset at the relaxed late afternoon time of 3:45pm (that leaves plenty of time for the little lady to clean up after the terror attack known as 'Dad's roast lunch'.

Bring a white chrysanthemum, hat, mug, joke, friend and $10 for Giggles'-inspired tucker and Ringo's slap-dash brew; bring raffle change for a chance to win an assortment of smelly products in pink boxes.
-------------------------------
UP AND CUMMING. († updated)
Friday May 28 — LoonRhasH @ Ulverstone
Saturday May 29 – Burnie H3 AGPU
June 12-13 – Chardonnay Highland Fling
Saturday June 26 - LoonRhasH @ Shearwater
July 2-4 – 2010 Rainforest Interhash www.borneointerhash2010.com
August 7 - Hash Ball
August 14 - Wild West Weekend VIII @ Waratah
September 4 - DH3 Tour de Pisse
October 10 - Global Harriettes Day (10/10/10)
October 16-17 - Burnie Ten weekend
-------------------------------
RECEDING HARELINE († updated)
R*n 1051 - 09/05/2010 - Giggles @ 15 Loongana Place, Somerset
R*n 1052 - 16/05/2010 - Dini @ TBA
R*n 1053 - 23/05/2010 - Chunder @ TBA
R*n 1054 - 29/05/2010 - AGPU - Ratchet @ 1054 Isandula Rd, Gawler
R*n 1055 - 06/06/2010 - HOFT - Dyke @ TBA
R*n 1056 - 13/06/2010 - Highland Fling

On! On!
Grizzly